Iqaluit (Nov 20/06) - My first and only abuser was my son's dad.

He acted as if he was so charming and ready for a family and asking to get pregnant after we just met that same year.

The relationship was so awesome and he didn't show any signs of having a temper or being abusive in any way.

We were so in love until I was six months pregnant. I guess my being pregnant gave him the idea that I was officially his property and he could treat me any way he wished.

He began questioning what clothes I wore, and what programs I watched and what friends I had.

I was blown away the first time he hit me because I was six months pregnant. Next thing I knew he actually looked for reasons to hit me, beat me and play with my mind.

He's a very intelligent abuser. First he preys on women, makes them fall in love with him, gets them pregnant and then uses and abuses them.

He used every trick in the book, he knows the right things to say: "I'm going to change," ... "I have changed," ... "I'm not like that any more," ... "I love you," ... "I won't do that any more."

These lines work because you do love the guy and want it to work just as much as he does until you wake up with a huge, black, bruised face and body or get shot at.

Yes, my son's dad took a 16-gauge shotgun, made sure it was loaded, stepped three feet in front of me and pulled the trigger.

In that silent flash of my life looking like it was going to end right there, the gun jammed.

He pulled the trigger and nothing happened even though it was loaded. He must still wonder, how did it not shoot when it was a fully functioning shotgun?

I did what most of us do, I forgave him because he said he loved me and wouldn't do it again.

Women have to rely on police and the justice system to protect us? That's a laugh.

Criminals these days are looked after a lot better than the actual victims who are mainly women and children.

Daddy gets a good meal, three times a day and a safe place to sleep in jail.

Mommy and kids have to leave their home to be safe, and find a way to feed and clothe themselves.

What a heart-breaking shame. I bet there are police out there who know the justice system is failing these women and children, but why don't they come forward to support tougher sentences for violent abusers?

It's not like they'll be out of a job if they did. They have a voice, too.

To this day, my son is without a father. His abusive dad doesn't talk to his son because I, the mother, don't want to make amends with him.

My son! On a regular basis, his heartbreaking wish is for a dad.

Like a victim, I've been too afraid to let any man back in my life. I'm constantly looking for signs of anger or abuse when I meet guys.

Kids suffer the most! I can endure a beating, but my son will always remember his dad is scary and abusive.

What hurts me the most, I can see abusive behaviour my son picked up from his dad though he hasn't lived him for the past 10 years.

We left his dad when my son was just turning two years old and now he's turning 12.

The last time that I left happened because my baby son and I were in bed and his dad came home and started arguing and punching me. My baby son crawled over me to protect me from his dad.

As soon as my son crawled over me, his dad grabbed our baby by the face and threw him to the wall.

I left and left for good.

It took me another three years to calm my son down.

My son was so terribly angry at such a young age. Today, we are so happy and thankful to have each other every day.

We've been through so much bad, we want to try to do more good than anything else. I'm also a recovering alcoholic.

I haven't had a drink in two years and it helps the healing to be sober.

Booze and healing don't go together.

Abuse and families are forced together, stop the cycle.

Whoever you are reading this story and others like it, become a voice for abused women and children.

I don't agree with just locking up abusers - force them to deal with their issues. Which most likely are the reasons for their being abusive.

And stop treating them like they are kings - women and children have just as many rights as they do. Abuse = violence, alcohol, death.

Healing = healthier families, happier families, families with chances to make it together in a tough world.

These days people get killed by their partners' hands.

If you heard your neighbours fighting or saw someone getting beaten, do you leave it alone thinking it's not your business or simply don't want to get involved?

If I didn't have God on my side, my son and I would be dead and his dad would've already been done serving his sentence and out on good behaviour.