Fort Smith (Oct 30/06) - "I told him I was leaving, he beat me to a pulp and threatened to kill my child, and so I left," said Lorna Theissen.

That was 30 years ago.

Today Theissen is the manager of Sutherland House, a women's shelter in Fort Smith. She fled an abusive common-law relationship at the age of 24 and has worked with abused women for 27 years.

Lorna Theissen escaped an abusive relationship when she was 24. Now she works to help those affected by domestic abuse. - Erika Sherk/NNSL photo

Statistics Canada recently reported spousal abuse is nearly twice as high in the North as it is in the provinces.

"I don't believe there is more abuse up here, but I do think it is more evident," said Theissen.

A recent Statscan report said that 12 per cent of people in the territories reported being abused by their spouse. In the provinces it was seven per cent.

There are many reasons why it might be more obvious here, said Theissen.

The small, tightly-knit communities of the North are a big factor, she said.

"Everybody knows everybody," she said. "You can't beat someone up without the neighbours knowing."

It may seem worse in the North, but abuse is everywhere, said Theissen.

"Abuse follows no boundaries," she said. "It affects rich people, poor people, of all genders, cultures, and colours."

It is simply harder to hide in Northern communities, she said.

Living in the North poses special challenges when it comes to dealing with abuse, said Theissen.

"In the South people can get help just like this," she said, snapping her fingers.

There need to be more shelters and places for abused women to go here, she said.

Spousal abuse is not just limited to women, said Crystal Ball, executive director at the Family Support Centre shelter in Hay River.

There are simply too few resources and too much stigma for abused men, she said.

"Men get battered as well; there are all different types of relationships. We have to work with men outside the agency. There are no shelters in the NWT for a battered man."

Stigmatization is a big problem when it comes to all kinds of abuse, said Ball.

Theissen agreed. Some women are afraid to come to the shelter because of what people will think, she said.

Theissen said, however, all, visits are confidential."We will sit down with her and problem-solve and look at the many ways her situation can be improved."

Another common fear women have is that their children will be taken away, she said.

"They can come to the shelter with as many children as they want, we will accommodate them."

Theissen added that if it appears that a woman is abusing her children, staff will sit down with the mother and a social worker to work things out.

As for the stigma, the women said that people need to realize that abuse is present in their society.

"[Spousal abuse] isn't going away. Without the public accepting that it is a problem, nothing's going to change," said Ball.

Awareness is slowly spreading, she said.

"Thirty years ago it was 'you made your bed, lay in it.' Now people are talking about it, but the wheels of change turn very slow."

The North is lagging behind the South when it comes to this awareness, said Ball.

It's more than just being aware, said Marie Speakman, a victim service worker with Yellowknife Victim Services.

People must take action, she said.

"When you hear your neighbour screaming for help, you need to be calling somebody. Call anyone, call the authorities," said Speakman.

The men and women being abused need to ask for help as well, said Speakman.

"I think there are too many conspiracies of silence. It's not okay to be hiding when you're abused," she said.

It's a very complex problem to tackle, said Theissen, because the abuse is often just one of many problems.

"Homelessness and abuse and drug and alcohol addictions are all intertwined. You can't see the start or the finish," she said.

These women are quick to point out that much work is being done all over the NWT to raise awareness about abuse.

However, it takes time. "I don't see us closing our doors any time soon," said Ball.