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Voice from the land

Northern News Services

Arviat (Sep 05/05) - When Billy Ukutak speaks about suicide, he does so from a broken heart.

A community counsellor at Qitiqliq High, Billy lost his son, Davy (Tagak) Ukutak, to suicide a little more than four years ago.

Davy was 19 and in the prime of his life at the time of his death.

Many thought the young man, an accomplished hunter and mechanic, had a bright future ahead.

"That evening Davy made the wrong choice and it was horrible when he died," said Billy. "People who have lost loved ones to suicide will know what I mean when I say it's very hard to put into words what you feel at the time.

"The pain is so unbearable."

The Ukutak family would not talk about Davy's death for a long time after he took his own life, something he said he now realizes that's the worst thing a family can do.

"Davy's death still hurts, but the sting is not there any more.

"We love our son, our brother, our grandson a but he's gone.

"Maybe we could have helped him if we knew how he was feeling, but he didn't tell us and that's why he's dead.

"That's why people commit suicide, because they don't talk to anyone.

"Suicide is still hush-hush in our communities and that's not the way to go to beat this problem."

Billy said suicide will never be solved if people only discuss it in whispers behind closed doors. "We have to make our youth understand how many people suicide really hurts and that it's not the answer.

"There's nothing positive about taking your own life. Nothing!

"These things won't happen overnight, but we have to start now.

"For our youth who may be struggling, we need to convince them to talk to someone before it's too late and not keep all their emotions bottled up inside."

After two youth committed suicide in Arviat this past spring, Billy said he knew he had to act.

"The youth were grieving so much that many adults were scared a chain reaction would start and the community would have to face more tragedy."

He organized a music festival to help youth focus on something positive and feel good about themselves.

The event was both highly emotional and highly successful.

But, Ukutak says, it was just the first step in what has to be an ongoing process.

"As adults, we know our youth can do anything they want in life. The hard part is coming up with ways for youth to see their own potential. The opportunities are there, but they need the confidence to set goals and follow their dreams."

Ukutak says an important key to suicide prevention is getting youth to talk to each other.

He says if a handful of youth realize their potential, they talk to others about their feelings and let them know they can do it, too.

"Once youth start talking, they will often open up and discuss issues that, maybe, they do not normally share.

"It's important for youth to know they have things to look forward to, and that they're contributing to their family, school or community.

He says there will never be an effective measure against suicide until people start talking more openly about the issue.

"I will organize a second festival this fall, but this one will focus on parents who lost children to suicide. There are a lot of parents in Arviat who have lost children to suicide.

"I want to bring them together so we can talk about what we are doing to deal with our loss, and share knowledge about something that is quite difficult to understand."