Yellowknife (Feb 18/02) - It takes some coaxing to get Lew and Margaret Delaney to remember details of the courtship that led to their 1949 marriage.

"That was so long ago," says Lew. He turns to Margaret with raised eyebrows, as if to ask, "Do you remember what we used to do?"

Margaret hesitates. "I've got to think about that," she says. "We used to go out to the movies," she then adds.

She recalls Mrs. Miniver, a story about the war: How Green Was My Valley, which is based on the novel about a mining family, and the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical State Fair.

"Those are classics now," notes Lew.

It's these two who are classics. Outlasting most modern-day couples, Lew and Margaret have seen each other through 53 years of living. They've met life's obstacles side by side. They've celebrated the birth of five children and shared with them their joys and sorrows. They've danced. And, most recently, Lew saw Margaret survive colon cancer.

But they don't talk about last year's event with any more emotion than when they discuss the basic childhood illnesses of their children.

Margaret says that she's most proud of Lew's ability to be a steady worker.

"He made sure he went to work and brought home a paycheque," she says. Then she adds, emphatically, "that's quite an accomplishment."

Lew's pride in Margaret is similarly straightforward.

"She was always there," he says.

"She cooked the meals. She looked after the kids. And when she was working, she was pretty steady too."

Lew sighs.

"It sure seems like a long time ago."

Beginning years

Back in the late 1940s, the young couple dated for about a year before Lew popped the question at Margaret's mother's house.

"I was happy because that's what I wanted. I wanted a family," says Margaret.

They moved from Hamilton, Ont., to Timmins in 1954, the year Margaret gave birth to their fourth child.

She's matter-of-fact about those early years of marriage and motherhood.

"I'd be getting the kids off to school, being a typical housewife doing what housewives do, I guess. I never got to go out much 'cause I had the four children.

"They were good kids."

Margaret does remember taking the bus to Hamilton to visit her sister. On a trip to another town called Simcoe, also in Ontario, Lew held the eldest boy.

"He threw up all over him," says Margaret.

She laughs at the memory. Especially at the part where Lew hands the young boy back to her, exclaiming, "Look what he did!"

Lew, incidentally, did change diapers.

"And they weren't pampers," he says with a smirk.

Has there been difficulty, conflict, in their marriage?

"There always is," says Margaret.

"If anybody says there isn't, they're lying," adds Lew.

"You didn't make much money. I went without so the kids could have," says Margaret.

"And they're all big eaters," Lew says. He pauses. "There were some rough spots, but we got through them."

"You have to have a lot of patience, with children and balancing a budget."

Give and take

Lew worked the mine in Timmins for 14 years. The family moved to Uranium City, Sask., and in 1971 to Yellowknife, where Lew worked for Giant Mine until he retired in 1994.

Margaret feels that in a marriage one has to give as well as take. She thinks today's marriages are unbalanced, and that one partner gives more than the other.

"And then the least little thing that happens ... 'I'm getting divorced.' They don't even try," she says.

You grow together, says Margaret about spending 53 years with Lew.

"You build a strong bond as the years go by. Lew loves me more now. He's different now then when I first met him."

Margaret maintains that Lew notices more things. She brings up the boots she's wearing. The heals are a little high. Or so Lew seems to think. Especially for wearing in the snow.

"You shouldn't wear those boots, not in winter," he repeats.

Margaret looks at me, but this time it's her eyebrows that are raised as if to say, "You see?" Then she patiently explains that these are winter boots.

Margaret stops speaking for a moment.

"I guess I have changed, too," Margaret finally adds.

Neither Lew or Margaret hesitates when they're asked about the happiest moment in their marriage.

In unison, they say the birth of their first child brought them joy.

"A son to boot," adds Lew.

Then Margaret adds that all the births were joyous events. Even the last one, 11 years after they thought they were done with all that business.

Their youngest was born in 1965.