Richard Gleeson
Northern News Services

NNSL (Nov 08/99) - Fort McPherson's Wally Firth tells the ultimate catalogue shopping story, one he heard from renowned Northern bush pilot Ernie Boffa.

Boffa met this chap who had a pile of money. The guy could not read and had never ordered anything through the mail, so Boffa told him how to do it -- "You can get anything in that catalogue that you want. Just send them your money and they'll mail what you ordered back to you."

The chap saw the beautiful pictures in the catalogue and with the help of Boffa placed his order.

"Some time later, he received this parcel on the mail plane and it was a dress," recounted Firth. "The chap put it under his bed."

When Boffa came in on the next plane, the fellow complained to him while holding the catalogue open to the page he ordered from, "You told me you could get whatever you ordered. This woman, she sent me her dress but she hasn't come in yet. Maybe she'll be on the next mail plane."

Though generally not as great a mixup as that, most Northerners have experienced the disappointment of mail order mixups.

Anna Davidge of Deh Cho Hardware in Fort Simpson recalled that about a lady in the community who ordered bedroom linen for her 17-year-old son.

Confusion somewhere along the line resulted in her receiving a pink comforter and sheets with images of Barbie dolls on the trim. Although the item was returned, it caused some stress for the teen.

"It was kind of an embarrassing deal for a 17-year-old," said Davidge. "He was very paranoid about any of his friends finding out about it."

Michelle Gruben of Aklavik said she has given up on Sears after three disappointing experiences this year.

"One time I ordered a rug and when it came in it was a whole different size and I couldn't afford to send it back."

Gruben said Sears refunded the difference between the rug she ordered and the one she got. But that wasn't the end of it.

"I ordered a jacket and they sent one that was a different colour. I sent that back and they sent me one too big."

But Gruben said Western Varieties in Edmonton is a shining light in the gloom. In the three years she has worked at the Aklavik rec department the company, which supplies contest prizes, has got every order exactly right.

Another man in Deline who didn't want his name used said he has also been disappointed by mail order.

"When you order something, by the time you get it it's always something different than what you expected. They always give you a substitute... that's the reason I stopped ordering from the catalogue."

He said he's ordered pants with a 34 waist and received pairs with 32 or 36-inch waists, shoes, shirts and jackets of a particular colour, only to find a different colour when he opened the box.